and heavens to betsy…

if you’re a wannabe writer or author, Shhhhhh, don’t tell anyone who you are… 

  https://be.freelancersunion.org/f/member/38867</a

don’t join any social media forums, discussions, groups 

do not keyword your press releases nor SEO (search engine optimize) them, either…  

do hide your manuscripts in a drawer and be sure to lock it with a key and then lose the key or throw it in the ocean

do not join any writer’s group

best not send out any query letters

do no research and read no magazines or newspapers or books

let the literary agents and publishers pass you by

score no ink

procrastinate galore

drink lots of tea and coffee and sit in pubs and tell the world about your latest writing project

moan, complain and tell the world how unfair it is

get a job that leaves you no time to write

play with the dog, kids, video games

marry a foreigner and move to another country where you do not speak the language

go live on Gilligan’s Island (or Tom Hanks Castaway) …

and Heavens to Betsy

scamper back to your manual typewriter, dungeon or basement and wait for the world to come running to your door…